HAPPY BIRTHDAY ZACHERY!!!

I am sitting here getting ready to go to bed but before I can I have one more very important thing I MUST do!! I have to make a Birthday card to leave under Zachery's pillow from the Birthday Fairy. He is so excited about his birthday!! Tomorrow he is turning 6 years old and I just can not believe it!!! 6 years old!!! I just don't know where the time has gone!!! I think back to when I was 5 months pregnant with him and hearing that he had fluid on the brain and the high risk there was with giving birth to him, I was already a high risk with having the cancer but this added to it. Plus I had a very high HCG level that was still tripling every week. I was HUGE to say the least and had to have 2 different types of stress testing done every week. They tried to induce me 3 different times but he was having no part of it. The fourth trip the intern was going to send me home until I grabbed his shirt and told him this baby was coming out of me one way or another if I had to take matters into my own hands I would but no way was I going home again!!! 32 hours of hard labor, a failed epidural and a husband that kept falling asleep and eating in front of me and him and a friend standing at my feet chanting "Push him out push him out Rah Rah Rah" and then suddenly Zachery's heart rate dropped and before I knew it they were running my bed down to the surgical suite. They did an emergency C-section. When they first got him out of me there was no crying, no screaming, not a sound.... the nurses rushed him over to the warmer and I could hear them talking and I hear the doctor ask for the Apgar and the nurse tells him 3. I looked at Jay and I said that's not good go be with the baby...then we hear a little tiny cry they said I could have a quick look but they needed to get the baby to the nursery. I thought I would see my baby soon after. A few hours later while I was resting in my room my parents showed up to see their new grandson. The look on their faces when they walked in my room after going to the nursery scared the crap out of me...I still had not held my baby boy. My mom asked if I had seen the baby yet at which I replied no they have not been in with him yet, she looked at me and started to cry. I started yelling that someone had better tell me what the hell is going on that's when a nurse came in and told me. Zachery still had some fluid on the brain but there was another problem...both of his lungs were full of fluid and he is having a hard time breathing on his own. They need to take him to the NI CU unit to be watched and taken care of. Zachery was 2 1/2 days old before I got to hold him for the very first time!!! And now....well now I just never want to let go of him!!!!! Anytime I go away I leave notes for him and his brother Nathan and the notes are always from an "Angel" letting them know how much mommy loves them. I tell them that I can e-mail the angels and that I can call them on special cell phones. Zachery has had to watch me go through so much with my cancer battle and as I was finding these pictures to post tonight I was actually looking for a certain layout that I had taken a pic of that I did recently that I wanted to post, if I find it I will post it another time. Zachery's birthday is always like an anniversary for me because it's like I made it another year!!! I came so close to losing him when he was born, that poor baby was born so sick...8 days in NI CU and then when he was 8 weeks old he ended up back in the hospital with meningitis and that was scary as well. He is a special little boy!!! So Happy Birthday Zachery!!! Mommy Loves Whole Big Huge Bunches!!!!